Here we are, on this great big planet that in the grand scheme of things is actually quite minuscule, just going about our daily business of whatever comfortable routine we have established for ourselves, paying little mind to the fact that it will all one day cease to exist.
Today's offer to use up life with this days resources is only good for this day, the same resources may not, likely will not, be available for use at a later date.
Its a risk.
Maybe if we wait a little longer more resources will be available than are available today, but if we wait, we risk not ever being able to accomplish what we hope or wish to because we put it off in hopes of something that doesn't happen.
The opportunity just becomes completely unattainable, chance missed, door closed.
Energy, stamina, fearlessness, imagination, the once plentiful characteristics of my youth led me to believe I could live in a shack as long as I had love. I even remember saying those words to my Mother in a phone conversation, I don't know what the rest of the conversation was, probably me trying to convince her I knew what I was doing and she pleading sanity for me knowing that I was kidding myself!
Just like the Beatles sing "all you need is love" do do do do do, "all you need is love, love, all you need is love".
They lied!
Giving the benefit of the doubt, it was not that they lied but that they were as young and naive as I was, with one real difference, they were fast becoming rich. Its a lot easier to sing songs about not needing anything when you've got plenty of money to buy everything you need, or want.
I was never a big Beatles fan, nor do I think their music was any more of an influence than any other music that permeated the airwaves of those yesterdays, it was simply an expression of the culture as a whole, as music is for all cultures.
I wasn't in any hurry to get anywhere back then, there was plenty of time, my vision for the future was pretty simple. I would raise my children with their father and live happily ever after, nothing fancy, nothing complicated.
Lots of songs were written about that too!
I "turned the page" with Bob Seiger, took a trip down "the yellow brick road" with Elton John, climbed "the stairway to heaven" with Led Zepplin, joined with Genesis and "the carpet crawlers", and when me and Bono still didn't find what we were looking for, I realized I needed to "seize the day" with Carolyn Arends!
Finances were not on my side then and never have been. My how things would have been different were that a resource available to me. Interestingly , money is an obstacle used as an excuse to keep us from our dreams and goals, but its not a legitimate reason to prevent us from making them happen.
We need to be flexible in our vision of that dream or goal, perhaps there needs to be some tweaking of how we can make it work, how to obtain the funds, how to save on expenses, a different route, a different support system. Often it will look entirely different than what was first envisioned, but will result in the same or even greater satisfaction upon achievement!
Its been 15 years since I stepped out in faith to make one of my dreams come to fruition. I had a plan, executed that plan to the best of my ability, with every resource I could muster and utilized fully the support of my amazing friends.
That unrealistic, highly improbable, nearly impossible dream, was reached. Everything that led up to it, every way it came together, every step toward its completion, all the way to the photo lab to develop the pictures to prove it, and the unforgettable memories etched forever in my fondest most empowering thoughts. Every detail surpassed my imaginings as it wound up looking very different from the way I thought it would.
Looking back, I would not change a single thing. It was the most incredible life changing experience for me, and because it was for me it was also for my kids. They lived with a different Mother after that, because of that. It was huge. I did it!
Maybe its at least in part because of early influences that my family has a pretty strong sense of "can do". For that I am very grateful.
I know that the God who made us each installed a curiosity section right next to the adventure section surrounded by the oh yes I can section of our brains! And then made our brains capable of absorbing what our senses transmit to it in such a way that we long to maximize and volumize and amplify all the beauty, potential, imagining and possibilities these brains can fathom.
Every one of us strive for bigger, better, fuller, more. Its what pushes the climber to the top of Everest and the bungee jumper off of the bridge, its what an architect imagines before building a Sears Tower or an engineer as he plans the space shuttle, its the drive of a motorcycle stunt man or Indy racer, its what keeps the reel spinning in an effort to finally catch the one that got away, its the thrill of a win even through a hundred losses, it's the big kahuna, the whole enchilada, the wow you did it, even when it seemed like you were your only cheerleader.
My son Jamey will leave in a couple of days to begin a journey into his own personal unknown. He is going "to see the world" by bicycle. A trip around these United States of America, he has talked about it for years. this trip was originally intended to be taken in a 4 wheeled engined vehicle but has morphed into a 2 wheeled peddle powered mode of transport.
At first and for a long time I was not on board, thinking from a Moms perspective of safety and what ifs. What if he needed help or what if he got sick or hurt or the bike breaks. My mind could not see beyond the what if's.
As time passed and it was still his topic of conversation I woke one morning, literally, to realize he was doing what I had done, what his grandparents have done, what many many other people have done, chased their dream and deliberately cornered it so it wouldn't get away wrestled it to the ground and stood over it, a victorious conqueror.
The what ifs turned into what if he didn't do it because he didn't have my support, could I live with bearing any of the responsibility for squashed dreams?
What if he like me, finds that by doing this thing he gains a sense of the joy of life that he would never otherwise gain? What if this thing charts a new path that leads him to his greatest wisdom's and best life changes forever?
Sure the old what if's are still there just as they were when I did my thing and as they are for everyone concerning their unknowns. That's my problem and should not be dumped on him. He deserves to have his Mother cheer him on to achievement, especially his Mother, I understand.
The best things to come of such an adventure is a deep rewarding satisfying sense of accomplishment and security, you find out you are not alone, ever.
God shows up and says, see, I told you, with me all things are possible, stick with me, I have so much more to show you!
I love my son more than oxygen, both are life to me. As a mom who cannot help being "concerned" I will have to hold my breath for a really long time while he's away.
But I know he will tell me the stories of his forever enhanced life changing experiences, and those stories will take my breath away!
