This and That

Over these past several weeks I have been piled on, stressed, stretched, pushed, prodded, dismissed, de-valued, unheard, unimportant, cut-down, cut-off, cut through, famished, exhausted and invisible. As I consider and write each of these descriptives, the experiences that go along with them pop into my mind. All together it is enough to cause me to break down, bow out, quit, walk away, wash my hands of it and shake the dust from my feet, finished.  

Over these past few weeks I have been complimented, liked, loved, encouraged, inspired, accomplished, recognized, thanked, provided for, helped, highly spoken of, admired, and honored. If this second list had not come to balance out or even negate those things on the previous list, it is a pretty sure bet that I would need to be medicated. At least!

Over these past few weeks of seemingly unending homework, deadlines, over commitments, achy-armed toddler carrying, messy house, dirty car, under filled bank account, under appreciation, fatigue, emotion taxation, and dreams on hold, I have wondered if it will ever be any different. 

And then over these past few weeks things have been different. 

Loved ones gathered, pay days came along, health stayed, friends came near, provisions continued, nature’s nectar was sipped, even gulped, baby hugs abounded, belly laughs compounded, well wishes were given and received, love was secured, faith proven and hope was consistently renewed. 

What tended to look overwhelming was not. What seemed impossible was possible after all. What was meant to derail did not. Missions were accomplished. Success was achieved. 

Sometimes over these past few weeks I have waited mouth open, tongue out, for a single drop, something, anything that would infuse with a burst of life. Other times I sipped sweet life through a long, slim straw, drinking it in at an unflurried pace.  Some of these past few weeks has been guzzled and gulped like there was no more where that came from and the first one to the bottom of the glass won. I did win. And I did lose. I smiled, frowned, laughed and cried. 

If there are lessons to be learned, and there always are, I would start with this; 

1) Don’t try to hurry through this to get to that, whatever the this and that may be. “This” you have, “that”, you do not yet, and may never. So find, even if it really means make, good of the “this”. 

2) If you get “that”, be grateful. 

3) Whatever I am thinking all along this way of life, is the same as what others have thought and do think. What I am feeling has been felt by others, what I wish for is wished for by others. I am not a freak, they are not a freak, and you are not a freak, no matter what the outside may suggest. The outside is just the costume for the ball. When the party is over and the lights are turned off, we are all the same under our costumes. 

4) And finally but of the most importance, remember. When it is all but certain you have been required to do what cannot be done, proceed forward as if you believe it can be. Remember the many other times you thought the same thing, but proved it to be untrue, it could be done. You did it.

Here we all are today, not as a lucky break, not by some fluke, but by the mercy of a God who thrills to the successes of His own, making wide the path so our feet do not slip. 

Over the past few weeks a lot of life has been lived, and I am so thankful for it, thankful for both the “this’ and the “that” common to us all. 

Over these next several weeks I will pray that the past several weeks lessons are not easily neglected. I will pray that I remain even and steady, remembering the successes as all around me is uneven and unsteady. I will pray for the grace to say to God “do as You please” when the this’ or that’s could not be farther from what I wish for. And I will trust what is next because He was trustworthy in the past.

My greatest hope is to do the next few weeks better than the past few, and better than any of the few before them. Whether privileged to sip life through a long slim straw, or guzzle it, or wait mouth open for a single drop on parched tongue, never forgetting to taste it.

 P.J.

There you have it,
Spring has sprung
Another semester
of life is done

The time was presented,
Invested or spent
And can’t be retrieved
Once it has been lent

Some frittered away,
Like dust in the wind,
Never minding the moments
Won’t come back again

 New semester begins,
a fresh notebook to fill
Of unwritten lines,
Stories yet to reveal

 Some of this and that,

Then the next thing you know

Yet another semester

Of life will go

 So here while we’re in it
We dare not miss
For the chance of “that”,
By sacrificing “this”

P.J.

Pure

Stop and Smell the Flowers!

Trust Jesus

All out joy!

Winter's Diamonds